Jokes: Tiger Woods in Ireland

During a golf tour of Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside.

The pump attendant, who was never the sharpest tool in the box, and knows nothing about the game, greets him in a typically Irish manner completely unaware of who the golf pro is.

“Top o' the marnin' to ya, sur," says the attendant. Tiger nods his head in acknowledgement and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.

“What are dose?" the attendant asked.

“They’re called tees” replied Tiger.

“Bejasus — what on God’s earth are dey for?” asked the Irishman.

“They’re for resting my balls on when I’m driving." replied Tiger.

“Fookin' Bejaysus!" exclaimed the Irishman, “Dem Germans tink of everything!”